hmm I have this feeling my com won't survive the month. lol.
and singtel really hates me. and vice versa.
but then again the internet is in a sense just a distraction and perhaps a means of escaping from the world at large. especially when all one does when one gets home is to just go on the com and stay there the whole night [as almost everyone does nowadays]. but then again it's also perhaps at the same time still a means of interaction with the world at large - and perhaps also exposes us to new areas / perspectives that we wouldn't otherwise be able to see (or at least not that easily lol). so maybe it's just doing what books did for an earlier generation. and maybe that's why I spend most of my time on wiki and stuff like nytimes.com. but yeah at the same time it's still perhaps an avenue away from the real world for most people. I think.
hmm but fiction does the same thing. so I'm not too sure.
but then the internet / the computer does tend to make us more distracted and less able to focus. yeah so those criticisms do hold. and perhaps what's more worrying is not the amount of time we spend online but rather this whole internet culture - to quote an NYT opinion piece I read not too long ago "[the internet can] bring out the worst in people. You’re straining after eyeballs, not big thoughts. So you go for the shallow, funny, contrarian or cynical."
also consider this:
"Why would I engage with people digitally whom I would never engage with actually? Why does the technology exonerate the kind of foul expression that you would not tolerate anywhere else?"
stomp is damn irritating.
--
ugh this is turning into a GP essay. just that I'm too lazy to string the arguments together so I'm just throwing stuff here and letting you connect the dots.
was at bridge camp today. was rather fun. but at the same time also kinda regret that I missed so much of bridge last year. so like it felt that this camp was also in a sense my camp ._.
I kinda messed up my CCAs last year lol. thanks to spending too much time at RI side. hmm. worth it? I dunno.
and of course it doesn't help that I haven't played bridge in about a month thanks to chemO and H3. and that some j1s are quite possibly already better than me.
lalala.
and this is weird I keep getting this sense of regret about not having done enough in j1. and I never got this feeling before / about any other year. maybe cos jc life seems particularly short. and maybe cos I wasted too much of it. or maybe cos it's my last year now so like inevitably I'm looking back and reflecting and all that. or maybe cos I really did mess up.
hmm who knows?
holidays are going to be quite horrible. need to mug for chemO selection (and odds that I do get in are less than 50-50 I think). plus complete the h3 coursework. and even after 7 out of 13 lectures I am still in no position to sit for the final exam - the questions are still rather incomprehensible. and I don't think I've learnt anything yet. argh. and still got all sorts of miscellany like reading geog books and rc stuff and mugging for CTs. blah.
but first I need to catch up on my sleep.
and stop procrastinating.
yay for conflicting objectives.
